Ask Alignor

What is the best way to change another person’s decision-making?

When your counterpart makes a decision with which you disagree, you may want to change their decision-making. This can be very difficult to do, however, particularly when others have already thought through their decision. The best way to try to alter your counterpart’s decision is to share new information that changes their calculation of the costs and benefits of the decision. The information that most often does this is one specific type of information: how the decision will harm your counterpart’s critical interests compared to your proposed course of action. If you choose to share such information, do so in a calm, clear, non-confrontational manner. This makes it easier for your counterpart to hear and consider fully the new information. Once you have shared the new information, allow your counterpart time and space to absorb and fully appreciate its impact on their critical interests.