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What should I do if I think someone is dishonest, unethical or lying to me?

When you believe someone is lying to you or being dishonest or unethical, it can be very unpleasant to deal with. On the other hand, if you do not deal with dishonesty, you may end up with bigger problems down the road. In order to determine whether and how to deal with suspected lying, dishonesty or unethical behavior, there are a number of steps you can take. First, you should figure out if the other person is intentionally misleading you, or whether there has been a genuine miscommunication or misunderstanding. You should be direct and open about what you believe the other person did or said and listen carefully to their response. This gives the other person an opportunity to correct any miscommunications or misunderstandings if that is what happened. On the other hand, if the other person is not truthful or forthcoming when given a chance to explain, then you have to consider what consequences, if any, you are prepared to impose. The consequences should take your overall interests into account and anticipate how the other person might retaliate. You should also consider what will likely happen in the future if you do not hold the other person accountable now for their dishonesty or unethical behavior. Once you have determined how best to satisfy your interests, you should implement that strategy in a calm, disciplined manner and avoid emotional or accusatory interactions with the other person. While this can be hard to do, it is a key to avoiding future problems with the other person.